BroApp Sends Your GF Texts For You

March 6, 2014
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When I hear about apps like this BroApp it just serves to annoy me. Not only does this app make men look bad, but it assumes that women are a sniveling bunch of clingy whiny rats that need constant attention from their men or else we’ll go bat shit crazy.

The BroApp acts as your ‘clever relationship wingman” and will send your girlfriend pre-canned thoughts and sentiments on your behalf, so you can hang out with your ‘bros’ without the pesky niggling of your conscience.

Oh and it’s ‘smart’ too. After entering your girlfriend’s name and number, it uses your location to track where you are so you don’t accidently send her a message when you’re with her. Aside from that it, it paces itself so that it doesn’t send a canned text if you’ve already texted her within the last hour. Basically as a BroApp, it does everything in its power to make sure you don’t get dumped for being a lousy ass boyfriend.

With it’s migraine inducing yellow, insistence at calling you ‘bro’ on every screen, and how saying BroApp out loud, quickly sounds like a burp, this App looks like it’s built for all the Barney Stinson’s out there. OR that it is in fact a very elaborate joke.

Apparently it has worked so well that on the FAQ page of the creators, they claim that their girlfriends never figured out that they were getting automated messages. What I wonder is, what happens after the first message. I’m sure if GFs are getting a text message asking about their day, they will reply, unless they too don’t give a shit about you. Then what? Does the BroApp give another canned message or are you actually *gasp* forced to talk to your girl?

Let me tell you something son, if you need an app to be nice to your girlfriend, then you don’t need a girlfriend, you need to grow up.

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  1. Hahaha girlfriends are way smarter than an app. This won’t last long…!

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