Cockblocked? Bloxers Want To Spare Your Public Shame

July 17, 2015
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Cockblocked? Bloxers Want To Spare Your Public Shame

Erections are normal. Erections are perfectly OK. But like internet ads they can pop-up at the most inopportune times. Forget the ‘naked in class/in front of your friends and family’ dreams that have plagued mankind for aeons. For a guy, one of our worst nightmares is being made the centre of attention, or called upon to do something publicly while sporting a hard-on that could cleave through a Redwood tree in minutes.

So – just like those pesky internet ads – we need a pop-up blocker, and thanks to Bloxers we might have found a way to prevent one of the most embarrassing situations on the social etiquette canon from occurring.

Bloxers want to help you or any men in your life from experiencing the negative consequences of what is ultimately a healthy function and reaction: the very public and very visible boner.

Currently crowd funding on IndieGoGo, Bloxers are looking to turn any embarrassed frowns upside down and with 25% of profits going to prostate cancer charities it’s a chance to make a difference by purchashing one of the more innovative novelty gifts in recent times. As Bloxers themselves tell you: “When life gets hard, Bloxers make it easy”.

Fear ye not, Gentlemen… Bloxers aren’t some cast-iron chastity nightmare. Quite the opposite; they were designed with your comfort and functionality right at the tip of the creators’ minds.

Each pair is made using all-cotton boxers and a hypoallergenic stretch fabric sewn along the inseam and at intervals around the leg. This fabric – helpfully dubbed ‘the deflector shield’ – covers your crotch in its entirety and allows you “to grow at a controlled pace while deflecting you to your chosen side”. And it caters to both side-swingers and the ‘switch-hitter’; for the man who can’t find comfort in routine.

As Bloxers’ pitch video demonstrates, theirs is a product that has been designed with a tongue firmly in the cheek – or a coc… actually, never mind – and their allusions to Da Vinci’s marble fig leaf on his sculpture of David are a sign that the company and product is in good hands; self-aware, humorous and inventive. What’s not to love?

People wanting to join in the fun on Twitter can browse the #StayHappy and #RealMenGetBoners hashtags.

As with any start-up, Bloxer have big ambitions. With an initial goal of $20,000 in their sights, their plans for… ahem… expansion with further funding are rather enticing. $50k of funding will bring forth solid new designs, while $100k will see them adapted for water-based activities. Life’s rich tapestry, hey? A list of the various donation perks are also listed on their IndieGoGo page.

So come on guys, get up… but don’t get down about it!

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