Another week, another Weird Sex News. Our Periscope has gone from strength to strength and the latest edition is no exception to the rule.
On the agenda this time is Alabama bestiality, Windows 10 wrangling, more Swedish tongue twisters and a fresh approach to British sex education. We wouldn’t have it any other way.
With next week’s stream being its 10th week anniversary, we’re hoping you’ll join us LIVE at 12pm EDT/5pm GMT/6pm CET for the next instalment. Until then, keep it weird and sexy.
YOU AIN’T NOTHIN’ BUT A POUND DOG
Seems we’ve talking a lot about bestiality on Weird Sex News lately. So my life has pretty much turned out the way that my career’s adviser predicted it would.
But when you get a story, you get a story and some stuff is just too good to turn down.
…or, if you’re Russell Joseph Myers of Alabama, the good stuff in this case is a dog’s arse. One that he fucked and was arrested for.
Sorry…’allegedly’ fucked, since we still have to abide the rule of law or something.
Anyway, the 54-year-old has been accused of taking his German Shepherd rather unnaturally on no less than four occasions. He was collared by the cops after he pocket-dialled somebody while in the act of… well…shepherding. BUT…even more shocking…he was found in possession of weed when he was arrested. Somebody call the cops! Oh… they already did. Nevermind.
Myers is the first person to be charged under bestiality laws that were passed in Alabama last year. Not long thereafter, a second man has been charged with having sex with his wife’s shih tzu after he became jealous of the attention the dog was receiving from his spouse.
Summation? If there is a God, we really are all doomed.
SLIDE IT IN ME
Sure as night follows day, people have been complaining about the recent Windows 10 update.
It takes too long to install, it’s full of bugs, it’s a Windows product and so to some it’s the epitome of all evil, Bill Gates has sex with dogs… no wait, scratch that last one.
For an anon Reddit user, Windows 10 proved to be a little more tricky than usual after his operating system decided that his desktop slideshow would show nothing but pornographic images on a loop.
OK sure, this could be worse, but it’s also a pretty potentially embarrassing situation. Particularly if our man here actually had some important business meeting.
“Loaded up WIN 10 last night and left it on to do its thing,” wrote user FalloutBoS on Reddit. “Woke up to wife asking why I set it to rotate all my porn images right on the desk top view. I have no idea how to shut that feature off and that computer is staying shut down until I do.”
BUT…a little cognition makes you realize that our mystery Windows 10 user would have to save all of his porn pics to the folder marked My Pictures. So he’s either incredibly naïve, stupid or wanted the attent…oops! Next.
WHAT A SNIP!
Not long ago we told you about how Sweden had invented a new word for female masturbation – Klittra – and now they’ve gone one further by coining a new word for the vagina.
The pre-existing words are seen as either too harsh or overtly-sexualised. The current crop includes fitta, muff and mutta. And now thanks to Malmo-based social worker Anna Kosztovics, the word…SNIPPA…is the new go-to term for all things Swedishly vaginal.
Ms Kosztovics felt the already existing words were too much for her daughter to use after being born.
“It came from a gender equality perspective” she said. “Boys have a word for it” – by which she means ‘snopp’, which means ‘willy’ – “and girls don’t, and that made me mad.”
Ok, Ok, don’t get your snippa in a twist!
TEACHER, LEAVE THOSE KIDS SOME PORN!
A new TV show is broadcasting in the UK tonight that shows a rather novel approach to sex education.
Goedele Liekens – a UN goodwill ambassador on sexual health, which must be a helluva job really, AND a former Miss Belgium, frites mit mayo indeed – is teaching 15 and 16 year old students – among other things – just how to write a porn script.
Indeed, the industry not exactly known for its verbosity now appears to be subtly finding intellectual talent via the UK school system. Ms. Liekens other approaches include giving girls a hand-held mirror in order to examine themselves and asking the boys to draw female genitalia-inspired art. Now there’s a recipe for trouble if we’ve ever heard of one.
Of course, it comes with the school’s blessing. They see it as a way of tackling sex education by bringing in lessons that try to confront skewed the propogation of skewed sexuality and imagery via porn.
“I suppose it was quite a big step to invite her” said Head Teacher Steve Campbell. “… but in the last year we have dealt with teen pregnancies and inappropriate texts, and without the shadow of a doubt, the biggest single influence on children is pornography,”
A February 2014 BBC report showed that while teen pregnancy rates have been on the decline in Britain, they are still higher than those of “other western European countries.”
Which – in this IMF and shadowy government-led world – proves that the younger generations ARE the ones getting fucked after all!