There are a lot of things in the fetish and domination world that don’t quite make sense, if you look at them logically. For example, how can one consent to be a slave when slavery is illegal? And is a mistress really always in charge? These are questions for another time. The illogicality that niggles at me the most (being a fully-fledged grammar Nazi) is the idea of ‘forced fem’ or ‘forced bi’. These refer to a male submissive being feminised, supposedly against his will, or made to engage in sex acts with another male (forced bi could, I suppose, be directed at a female sub, but I’ve only heard of men wishing to engage in it). But it’s illogical when men ask for it – and it’s quite a popular request made of dominant females.

It’s not just the illogicality of requests for anything ‘forced’ that niggles at me though. In my non-expert opinion (I’m not a psychologist), forced fem or forced bi stems from one of three aspects. The first is enjoying the element of coercion, even if the sub actually desires the experience he is being ‘forced’ to undergo. This in particular makes me muse on how illogical supposed domination can be. He’s getting exactly what he wants, so how is he being dominated? Perhaps this leans more towards the ‘game’ aspect of domination and submission.

The second aspect annoys me though. I believe strongly that, subject to the usual caveat of all participants being consenting and all activities legal, you should never be ashamed of your sexuality. Guilt is arguably the most useless of human emotions. If you want to experience sexual acts with another man, then just go ahead and  do it. If you’re curious about expressing your feminine side, then fling on a dress. Enjoy it. Experiment. You may like it, you may not. But have the balls to admit that you want this (do tuck them away though).

It’s the third aspect that really gets me riled. This is the implication that being feminised is somehow humiliating. As a woman I really object to that idea. Actually, I fully support the right of men to wear dresses (it’s just a pity that most of them don’t have the legs for it). And I’m proud of being female, so why would I want to humiliate a man by dressing him as a woman?