Interview: How To Throw A Sex Toy Party

December 30, 2014
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Interview: How To Throw A Sex Toy Party

Parties and sex are always a fun affair; put them together and add in some toys and you’re bound to have oodles of fun! Sex toy parties are a way for discreet women to have some naughty fun without being judged. It’s a way to privately look at some sex toys without having to go into a sex store, which were initially only for men, although nowadays there are some pretty awesome neutral sex stores that are comfortable for both men and women.

Sex toy parties got popular in the 70s, where women would get together to learn about, as well as buy, sex toys. Throw in some cocktails and music and you’ve got yourself a cheeky evening right there. Back in the day, women didn’t go into sex stores, which is why these parties got really popular. Nowadays, while sex toys are more ‘normal’ it’s still quite hard for a woman to walk into a sex store and be all like, “Yeah, I’m just browsing,” and be all cool about it. So sex toy parties are still a fun way to browse and be with friends and cocktails!

I spoke to Hernan G (not his real name), who with his ex-wife used to organize sex toy parties, to give me the lowdown on how to organize parties. While sex toy parties are usually a woman-only affair, that doesn’t mean that men can’t get involved or partner up with their partner/wife to help organize. In Hernan’s case he managed the business and financial side of things, while his wife was the face of the parties and handled the marketing. It worked well; they (and everyone who attended) had fun and made some money on the side as well.

These days sex toy parties don’t have to be only for women. There are sex toys for both genders and all sexual orientations. Sex toy parties for gay men are also very popular! If you’re interested in throwing your own, then read on to get some real tips on how to put together your very own party!

What got you started in the sex toy party business? Why did you start? Why a sex toy party? Did you do it for the love of it? Did you make any money?

I’ve always been a fan of sex toys, but it all started when my wife was invited to a party and loved it.  She was too shy to do them herself so we got together with her friend that was currently doing them and tried to figure out how my wife could be involved and how we could make it more profitable.  We decided to think outside the box and put some money towards making something good into something great and for the year that we did it we made enough money not only to justify the investment but to think about branching out on our own.  Unfortunately life got in the way, the friend moved away and my wife did not want to continue without her.  As for me I had the perfect excuse to buy all kinds of toys that I would have never bought otherwise and to try them and experiment with my wife and it was a lot of fun.

Who else was involved? How long were you throwing parties?

I was involved as a financial backer, my wife and her friend were the ones that threw the parties, my wife would handle product/inventory and her friend would do the actual presenting and explaining at the parties.

Was it hard to put together a party?

No not at all, we were very good at contacting people that had attended previous parties and offering them great discounts to throw the next party and most of them already had a list of people they wanted to invite ready.

Where did you get your toys? Are there companies that cater to this?

At first we would get the starter kit from Slumber Parties, then we upgraded to their largest kit, then we did 2 kits, then we started supplementing with products from California Exotic Novelties and lingerie from Fredericks of Hollywood.  That’s when we started making real money because of the rates at which we were buying, the last 6 months or so we did it the only thing that Slumber Parties had to do with us was their name.

How did you get people to come to the party? Who did you invite? Who was it for? Women only? Why Women only? How many people usually came?

Everything happened through referrals, we would contact women that had been at a previous party and would give them incentives to throw their own party, the more people that came the bigger the incentive.  The parties were only for women as that was one of the rules of Slumber Parties (now Pure Romance {Pure Romance acquired Slumber Parties January 2014}).  A usual turnout was 10-15 women but we did have turnouts as high as 40.

How would a party look? Do you arrange toys around, or show catalogues, etc.?

All the parties were different, I was able to go to a few to help set up.  It all depended on the host; she would say what she thought her guests would be conformable with.  There were times that it was very low key, looking at catalogs and the only products that were taken out of the bag and passed around like lotions and body oils and stuff like that, other times the bag would be completely emptied and all the products would be passed around and inspected, there were also things that the women could sample so they would take turns going into the restroom and putting on for example some kind of lotion that would make certain parts of the body tingle.  There were a couple of times that they used the toy party as the basis for a bachelorette party, those are the ones I usually went and helped set up and take down as my wife and friend doing the presenting were usually too drunk by the end to do much of anything.

Did you have any extra things going on (as in, extra shows, performances etc.)?

No at this time it was just the parties.

How did people buy? Did they place an order and you got it to them, or do you have the toys at hand? How did it work?

At first we followed the rules and just did orders like Slumber Parties wanted us to.  As time went on we kept getting the same feedback that the products took too long and that the orders were wrong, [or] sometimes got cancelled for no reason at all.  So we started bending the rules at first by buying large quantities of the things we knew sold the most and having them on hand.  And then we broke the rules altogether by bringing in products of a higher quality from different manufacturers.  This gave us the chance to set the price and give discounts to people that purchased on the spot.  Besides when you have something in your hand and you’re in the mindset that you might want to try something and you see people around you buying you’re more likely to buy.  FYI when we did this we were selling more than double at each party and our profit margin was a lot higher because we were replacing inferior products with better products that we paid less for.  It got to the point that the only thing we used was the Slumber Parties name.

Any tips for newbies?

Do your research, really get to know your likes and dislikes and talk to people.  Every woman out there has a different taste and comfort level so if you’re going to do it as a business you have to understand your customers.  What you like might not be something that they would enjoy.

Learn to talk to people about not only toys but sex and pleasure, a lot of people have this perception that sex toys are in some way a replacement for sex.  You need to be able to explain that the use of toys or creams or massage oils, even lingerie, they are all for the enhancement of sexual pleasure.  It’s not a replacement; it’s an addition.

Interview: How To Throw A Sex Toy Party

While Hernan bent the rules here somewhat, we’re not asking you to do the same. This was his way of throwing sex toy parties, and I’m sure you’ll find a way that suits you. Either way, be safe and enjoy yourselves!

Interview: How To Throw A Sex Toy Party 3 votes

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