Hey Hey! It’s Steak and Blowjob Day!

March 13, 2014
12 Shares Facebook 10 Twitter 0 Google+ 1 Pin It Share 1 12 Shares ×

I had the weirdest reminder pop up my calendar this morning. It said that tomorrow was ‘Steak and Blowjob Day’. Now, I didn’t know what the hell that was, although as a man I obviously liked the sound of it a great deal. So I looked it up and guess what? Steak and Blowjob Day is an actual thing.

Steak and Blowjob Day

It’s a special holiday for men, celebrated on March 14th, one month after Valentine’s Day. Now, according to the Urban Dictionary, Valentine’s Day is a holiday for women. I’m not sure that’s entirely true; I mean I always thought it was a day for both of the people in a relationship. Sure, it’s marketed more as a day where the lady is treated like a queen, but, ostensibly, everyone should be getting cards and presents.

However, I’m willing to change my precepts on that one, if it means that I get to look forward to Steak and Blowjob Day from now on. So, how should one celebrate Steak and Blowjob Day? Well, the clue’s in the name. Forget the cards and cutesy little gifts; forget the sweet whimsy of a handcrafted scrapbook choc-full of ‘moments’ to remember forever… Forget all of that; simply cook up your man a juicy, bloody steak and then give him a nice juicy blowjob (preferably not bloody, assuming you’re not an Anne Rice fan).

Now, there’s no special order to the steak and the blowjob, although I’d recommend sticking with the way the day is named. You may run the risk of falling asleep before the steak’s ready otherwise. If you leave the BJ until afterwards, I image it’s probably better to wait a good half-hour after the steak’s gone down before your partner does.

Hmm, now I think about it… I wonder what it would be like to enjoy both, at the same time? Heck, I guess I’ll just have to find out. After all, that’s what investigative journalism is all about.

Hope you guys have a Happy Steak and Blowjob Day tomorrow! You got plenty of time to make sure your partners know about it now.

You’re welcome.

Rate this post

12 Shares Facebook 10 Twitter 0 Google+ 1 Pin It Share 1 12 Shares ×

comments

Comments

Add a comment. No registration required!

  1. Oh holy mother of all that is good and pure!
    What a glorious day 🙂

Comments are closed.

Warning

Adult-oriented material ahead!
Do you wish to proceed?

YES

No thanks.