This Week in Television – Star Date: 2-14-14

February 14, 2014
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Well, Internet, this is the worst you’ve seen me yet. Today is Valentine’s Day, and not only is the lovely creature of my endless affections (shut up, you guys) far from my present location, this week is also extremely lax on television shows I dig. It’s nonsense of the highest order! Only one of my favorites aired this week, and I am most displeased. So this will be a Valentine’s Day style mess of a review. Hope you enjoy!


How I Met Your Mother, the most gooey 21 minutes of romance on TV, decided not show its emotional face this week. Carter Bays and Craig Thomas, you evil geniuses, playing with our feelings like that (you oughta be ashamed).

New Girl aired though, and it was a surprisingly lovely little episode. In this one, we meet Jess’ sister, a volatile, saucy lady who makes her first appearance in jail. She is kinda rad, and a super fun contrast to the bubbly Zooey Deschanel character. Also, Schmidt tries to pick up a girl at a Bar Mitzvah (new goal), with Nick acting as the best wingman of all time. Seriously, I wish he’d wingman for me.

new girl

Is it just me, or is Schmidt becoming progressively more Jewish (to hilarious results)? Also, there is sexual tension between Coach and Cece, and Winston and Birdie invite the gang over for many varieties of soup (Winston is possibly a sociopath). The episode was a solid installment, with some great bro moments from Schmidt and Nick, and also Jess’ sister in a bathrobe.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. didn’t air, which is dreadful because Joss Whedon is great at leaving cliffhangers (the beautiful bastard). We’re gonna have to wait until the end of the month for the resolution of Skye getting shot (she’s totally going to have super powers) and Mike Peterson being revealed as Deathlok. I’m excited, but not amused by this hiatus.

Community was just getting awesome, and now they take the same route as Whedon’s show by not airing for a bit. Why is February the worst month ever? Is it because Troy got captured by pirates? It better be.

new girl

At least Elementary should have aired, but of course it didn’t. I’ve grown fond of watching Jonny Lee Miller nervously strut around as Sherlock Holmes, and I want that back.

It’s pretty elementary, my dear Internet, why all my shows aren’t airing. Usually I don’t get to blame Russia for anything, but this time I do! The Olympics are of course receiving massive coverage the next couple of weeks, which is rad, I guess, but sports are no substitute for Barney Stinson being drunk, Nick Miller being awkward, Agent Coulson suavely being badass, Dean Pelton making everyone uncomfortable, and Lucy Liu shrugging off even the strangest of Sherlock’s behavior. I guess the only consolation is the giant pile of controversy surrounding the Olympics this year; I am perfectly fine, I guess, amusing myself with Sochi’s hotel fiascos. Fun times, fun times (the corruption isn’t fun, but that’s for another rant or several).

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