As sure as the world never stops turning, it never quits thrusting either.
A cursory glance at social media will usually dredge up a headline detailing some sexual misdemeanor or other. BaDoink is more than happy to round them all up into a neat little package for you. This time we’re going on a global jaunt!
It seems that the UK has had a good week when it comes to weird sex stories.
First, the Institute of Sexology exhibition at the Wellcome Collection in London is currently displaying what archaeologists and scientists believe to be 28,000-year-old sex toy.
Uncovered in a cave in Germany, the smooth stone phallus goes some way towards discovering just who some of the earliest kinkmeisters were in our evolutionary history.
BaDoink can’t help but wonder if the object was smooth to begin with or had to be…worn down from use. Perhaps it doesn’t bear thinking about!
Meanwhile, in the north west of England and a town called Wigan, local man Paul Bennett pleaded guilty to charges of having sex in public…with a POSTBOX.
Bennett, whose biggest crime was actually getting caught, was picked up by cops after being seen pulling down his trousers and rubbing himself up, down and against the postbox while repeatedly shouting “wow!”
According to British tabloid The Mirror, after delivering his package our would-be postman “pulled his pants up then swung on a lamppost before looking at a reflection of himself in a window” before being accosted and arrested.
The catalyst for Bennett’s downfall was that he, like most other things connected to the mail service, came a little too late.
Over to Austria now, where a trainee teacher faces the axe after injuring her back while taking part in a raunchy reality show.
Doris Kemptner, a former Miss Vienna, missed classes after injuring her spine while participating in Rendezvous In Paradise, a show similar to The Bachelor. In this instance, 11 women vie for the attention of just two men.
Feathers flew among the Viennese public, who demanded her role and suitability, as well as her cost to taxpayers, be investigated. Chiropractors apply within!
Finally, back (presumably) over the pond to either the US or Canada, Reddit’s usual hum peaked to a noisy spark as one man live-blogged the discovery of and final confrontation over an affair between his wife and a mystery man.
The user – known only by his handle MyLifeSuxNow – kept readers on tenterhooks as he outlined his discoveries, engagement of a private investigator and finally, an emotional showdown.
Voyeuristic, or a sign of the times? We can have that debate another time. MyLifeSuxNow’s thread contains all the high and low lights you would expect from such a story.